Normalizing Non-Monogamy - Interviews in Polyamory and Swinging

HAZL is a passionate and driven 29 year old queer, polyamorous, kinkster, writer, and musician who first learned about non-monogamy when she was 19. She is also an incredible storyteller and takes us on her decade-long relationship journey that's filled triumph, struggles, laughs, and beautiful transformations. HAZL's story takes us into the familiar messy first few years of exploring polyamory where she's learning and unlearning so much about life and who she is. After a few years she found herself in a monogamous partnership that was her safe space and anchor as she gave everything she had to chase her dream of becoming a professional musician. As she ended that partnership, she made her way back to polyamory again... But this time it feels different to her with a whole new perspective and purpose. Professionally, HAZL is a Queer singer-songwriter from Portland, Oregon. Graduating with a full ride from Los Angeles Academy for Artists and Music Producers (LAAMP) in early 2024, HAZL has created an infectious, vivid, and inspiring sound that’s all her own. Beginning as an acoustic artist, she is now playing in the world of electronic sound. Influenced by Labrinth, Sylvan Esso, and Imogen Heap, HAZL is on track to release her Debut EP R.E.A.L. (Real Emotions Are Loud) on March 24th, 2025. Connect with HAZL via Instagram or check out her Linktree for all of her work! Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Our interview with Fox is full of energy and so much love! Fox and her partner eloped after being together for just a few weeks, and then eight years into their marriage she realized she's queer and polyamorous... They've now been married over 11 years and have been working together for the last few years to redesign their partnership in a way that feels safe, supportive, and authentic for both of them. Fox's story is a vulnerable, beautiful, and powerful reminder that each of us is continually learning about ourselves, growing, and evolving. As we evolve, so do our relationships and it's not always easy... Yet, the challenges and growth that we encounter are also opportunities to bring us closer together. Fox wrote a better bio for herself than we ever could have! And so, a bit more about the lovely Fox! Fox Eros (M.A., AMFT), known as 'The Polyamory Therapist' has earned a reputation as an incandescent, deeply empathetic and passion filled Psychotherapist, Writer and Speaker. She has a Master’s Degree in Marriage and Family Therapy, and is an expert in Consensual Non-Monogamous Relationships, as well as Sex Therapy. Fox's calling is to radicalize pleasure, love and sexuality. She is currently at work on her first book on polyamory and is a contributing writer and educator in the polyamory field. Fox continues to be sought out to help those with life stress, self-worth, identity, impacts of trauma and issues in relationships, sex and intimacy. Fox identifies as a pansexual, panromantic, polyamorous, multi-ethnic, BIPOC femme person; and lives on the land of the Chumash and Gabrielino-Tongva First Peoples. Her pleasures include being a Beloved, forest bathing, morning mochas in the sun, crushing on our infinite Universe and connecting to her Ancestors. Connect with Fox on social media @thepleasurefox or her website foxerosinlove.com. Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

This week we're dressing up for Halloween! Instead of our regular weekly interview we're bringing you episode 377 of the Multiamory Podcast "Polyam Beginners, Healthy Boundaries, and Ethical Hierarchy!" We don't normally give advice on our show but when you have a chance to tap into the brilliance of Dedeker, Emily, and Jase... You take it! This is a listener Q+A episode where they discuss: What was the biggest challenge in your polyam journey, and how did you overcome it? What are some good steps to reconnect after initiating a break in the relationship? Any advice for someone looking to explore other polyam sites away from the safe harbor that the Multiamory Discord has become? How can one be a good beginner? What are some red flags or warning signs you see many fledgling polyam folk brush past or ignore? When de-escalating or transitioning relationships to one with less closeness and frequency, do you have any tips for adjusting your expectations or managing hurt feelings? How to set healthy and ethical boundaries within the context of a highly entangled, mutually desired lifelong commitment. Specifically, boundaries that don’t look like “veto power” or interference in other relationships, but also don’t just come down to “walking away” in the presence of incompatible strong preferences (not needs). How do you know the difference between genuine third party trauma or if emotions are being used to force a certain result? How do you spot this before becoming invested? To learn more about the incredible work the Multiamory team does, please check out their website at multiamory.com Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Meshai and Fin team up together to answer amazing listener questions every fourth Friday of each month! Today we are join by the Director of Marketing and Communications at Global Protection Corp. (manufacturers of ONE and MyONE condoms) and we are super excited! Milla is here to talk about and answer all your condom questions in a special ask us anything episode we're calling Condom University! Enjoy! Meshai is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and is certified in both Trauma Therapy and Sex Therapy, and she is trained in Dialectical Behavior Therapy. Learn more about Meshai and all of her work over at expansiveconnection.com! You likely know me (Fin) from over 300 episodes of Normalizing Non-Monogamy. Just in case you don't, I cohost the podcast with my partner Emma and we have been in an open relationship together for over 15 years. I also completed a sex and relationship coaching program through the Somatica Institute in March 2024! Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

In his early twenties, Dave never really felt like he wanted the same things that everyone else wanted out of relationships. During that time he was mostly single and would find himself breaking off relationships after a few months, before they got serious so nobody got hurt too badly. He wasn't really wanting to find "the one" even though that's what it seemed like he was supposed to be doing. In his mid-twenties he started finding communities that were at the intersections of sex-positivity, neo-tantra, and polyamory. The support of these various different intentional communities opened Dave's world up to a completely different way of forming relationships and connections. Today, while Dave identifies as a solo polyamorous person, he is much more focused on creating healthy intentional communities that support learning, living and loving authentically as the imperfect humans we all are. Dave Booda is a writer, musician and social entrepreneur. He is the co-founder of IntimacyFest and hosts The Darkness Experiment. He has led over 450 workshops on connection, touch and relationships and has consulted for and facilitated experiences for companies, communities, retreats, festivals, conferences, birthday parties, weddings, funerals, and gatherings of all kinds — with the intention to inspire authenticity, connection and group cohesion. He has published over 200 essays for boodaism.com and played over 1000 shows as a touring singer/songwriter. He is a former Naval Officer and graduate of the U.S. Naval Academy, currently serving on the board of directors for the Foundation for Intentional Community while living in rural San Diego, California. Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Eve takes us all the way back to high school where she first learned about non-monogamy through some friends and even dabbled in a triad for a week or so. After college she got married and a few years later she and her husband started opening up their relationship. Since then, Eve has been on a 20ish-year journey to find what works best for her when it comes to love and relating to others. Today, Eve identifies as a queer, solo polyamorous, relationship anarchist who prefers a more parallel relationship dynamic as opposed to kitchen table polyamory... Like most of us, Eve learned a lot along her journey and we're grateful that she joined us today to share her story. Eve Rickert is also the co-author of More Than Two, Second Edition and is a Gen X, queer, solo polyamorous, relationship anarchist, neurodivergent cis woman living on unceded WSÁNEC and Lekwungen territory on the west coast of the place currently known as Canada. She is the curator of the More Than Two Essentials series and the non-monogamy resource site morethantwo.ca, the founder and publisher of Thornapple Press, and the founder and mastermind of the science communications firm Talk Science to Me. Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

We are so excited about today's beautiful conversation with Mike! He's been questioning socialized norms that didn't feel right for most of his life... We get deep with him on his experiences uncovering his queerness, questioning monogamy as the best relationship model for himself, and how he navigates ambiguity in different connections. We also talk a lot about mental health, the life-changing impact of therapy for him, and the power of finding the strength to be yourself, especially when it means pushing against everything you've been conditioned with for your whole life. This is a powerful conversation and we hope you find it as meaningful and healing as we did. Mike is much better at describing himself and his work than we are and so we asked to use the bio from his website... Permission granted! Hey there, I'm Mike. I'm endlessly fascinated by and interested in people. Why we do what we do. Where we come from. How we choose to live our lives. What interests us. What our passions are. I love to listen. My goal, if we decide to work together, is to help you be the person you want to be, whether the things you want are related to your relationship(s), your career(s), or your life in general! I don't have a fancy degree, but I do have a certification (and am working on more). What I think is more valuable than a piece of paper is that I have a welcoming ear and quite a bit of life experience. I'm a thirty year veteran of the high-stress music industry, having worked everywhere from distribution to PR to behind the counter at a record store. Over the last decade, I've become involved in the mental health community as an advocate and a volunteer for various organizations. I've also become a sex and relationship educator, drawing on my experiences as a queer person whose relationship orientation leans toward CNM (consensual non-monogamy). I'm a second generation American with an Afro-Caribbean background, and have a wide variety of tastes, experiences and people in my community. I like to think I can relate to just about anyone in some way, shape or form. For the past three years and counting, I've also hosted and produced a podcast called Detoxicity, which focuses specifically on men and how we can work to move past the socialized behaviors that often handcuff us. How we can be more open, more caring, more sensitive, and be better versions of ourselves for the people in our lives and communities, and most importantly, for ourselves. I've spoken to and learned from over 150 men, from various walks of life, every race and ethnicity, sexual and romantic orientation. And I learn more every time I speak to someone. I'm in the process of learning every day, and I want to be a guide and assistant to your learning journey as well! Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Over the last three weeks you've heard Ava, Pinky, and Anthony tell their individual stories... Today, we bring them together to hear how three people with different backgrounds, experience levels, and relationship preferences come together to create a beautiful relational ecosystem that works for each of them... Even if it's not always perfect. Enjoy! Earlier this year Ava, Pinky, and Anthony started a new podcast called Three Shades of Grey where they talk about the ups and downs of exploring non-monogamy in three very different ways and how the three of them make it work together. Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Meshai and Fin team up together to answer amazing listener questions every fourth Friday of each month! This month's incredible questions come from our private community and are about moving at different paces when opening up a relationship and whether or not you should share your feelings with someone when your interests lie outside of the agreements of another relationship of theirs. Juicy stuff! Meshai is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and is certified in both Trauma Therapy and Sex Therapy, and she is trained in Dialectical Behavior Therapy. You likely know me (Fin) from over 300 episodes of Normalizing Non-Monogamy. Just in case you don't, I cohost the podcast with my partner Emma and we have been in an open relationship together for over 15 years. I also completed a sex and relationship coaching program through the Somatica Institute in March 2024! Check out the full show notes here. Submit a question for our Ask Us Anything Episodes! Click here to join our upcoming Virtual Meet and Greets! Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Check out our weekly peer support groups! Skip the ads and sign up for the Premium Feed! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Pinky lives life with a whole lot of zest and enthusiasm! And, as she describes it, sometimes a bit impatiently. Although, we might argue that her impatience could be attributed to some built up excitement! I tried writing more about Pinky but her bio over on her website at 3shadesofgrey.com captured it much better than I was able to: I was born and raised into a religious, and conservative family. Women were taught to not be heard or to put their needs and wants first. As I grew, I found myself in relationships with people who had similar beliefs to my family. I was in a nearly two decade relationship, with a man who had no interest in sex, my sexuality or my desires. I was made to feel guilty when I expressed my sexual desires. Outside of the bedroom, however, we built a solid family together. I stayed for my children, and then I decided, I needed to leave for myself. It was during this relationship that I first read the Ethical Slut, and it opened my eyes to what relationships could be. My ex and I attempted to have an open relationship, but that was very short lived. It wasn’t until I met my husband Anthony that I learned more, and realized this was something I wanted to explore further. That’s when I decided to do some research and further educate myself. I became more and more intrigued by the freedom and the voice that was give to women in the non- monogamous world. The education and conversations that my now husband and I had, built a strong foundation for a successful relationship. During our journey, we talked about things that most couples never even discuss, and we spoke about them open and honestly. Anthony and I now have an open marriage. I prefer polyamorous relationships, and some situational swinging. Truly I thrive the best on one on one engagement with open and like minded people who are willing to walk the road less traveled. As a sapiosexual I connect best on an intellectual level first, building a strong relationship, and then engaging physically. Earlier this year Pinky started a new podcast with her husband Anthony and metamour Ava. On the Three Shades of Grey podcast they talk about the ups and downs of exploring non-monogamy in three very different ways and how the three of them make it work together. Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Today, Ava identifies as a polyamorous, kinky, swinger... Yet, for most of her life she worked really hard to play by the rules doing what she was "supposed to be doing." And then, in 2018, a friend invited her to an adult Christmas party. It turned out to be a life-changing party! We loved Ava's description of herself in her bio over at 3shadesofgrey.com and so we borrowed it to help give you a better idea this amazing human! Hello, my salacious friends, I am Ava Moore. I have been non-monogamous since 2018. Who am I kidding? More like 2012, but I didn’t have a name for it, or accept it back then. I called it “multi- tasking”, however, I was working very hard to be monogamous, and was successful, because I thought that is what I was supposed to do. I am a single mom. I love people. I love sex. I love connecting. While I have multiple partners, for the most part, I stay in what I call “my circle”. These are the 4 or 5 people who I trust most and who I am the closest to. We build friendships, relationships and we are there for each other. Now, there are times, I will let my hair down and go to a party, or dare I say, host a party for my favorite people. While I identify as a straight, curvalicious, plus size, single female, I do have my heteroflexible moments from time to time. Most importantly however, is that I am a Sapiosexual. Your brain and personality are what attract me first. I look forward to getting to know all of you, as Pinky, Anthony, and I embark on this wild journey together. To clarify that last sentence... Earlier this year Ava started a new podcast with her partner Anthony and metamour Pinky. On the Three Shades of Grey podcast they talk about the ups and downs of exploring non-monogamy in three very different ways and how the three of them make it work together. Anthony shared his story last week on Episode 357, Pinky will be on next week, and the three of them join us together in two weeks. Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Anthony has always felt like he was a bit different and questioned everything. Even questioning things so much that he was once asked to not return to Bible school as a child. Years later, while working as a club promoter he met a dominatrix who invited him to his first dungeon party and life hasn't quite been the same since... Even though his first experience was a bit traumatic for him, a new world of possibilities opened up and he began exploring. Over the last twenty-ish years Anthony has been exploring non-monogamy through swinging (partnered and solo), kink and BDSM (he eventually recovered from the first dungeon party), and polyamory (he's now married and has multiple committed partnerships). Join us today as Anthony takes us on his adventure and shares with us how he's learned, grown, and built an incredible community of partners and friends where he gets to be himself without being worried of getting kicked out of Bible school. But wait, there's more! Earlier this year Anthony started a new podcast with his wife Pinky and his partner Ava. On the Three Shades of Grey podcast they talk about the ups and downs of exploring non-monogamy in three very different ways and how the three of them make it work together. Check out the full show notes here. Click here to join our upcoming Bay Area Retreat - Sept. 13-15, 2024 Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Andrea grew up in a fairly conservative suburb and first came out in the queer and leather communities around 2000-2001 after joining the circus. For them, non-monogamy came as part of the queer and kinky package. Over the next decade-ish Andrea explored many different phases and configurations of kink and non-monogamy before a series of serious health issues brought monogamy back in as the default. These same health issues also robbed Andrea of their ability to experience the same kinds of pleasure and enjoyment out of sex and kink as they had been able to for so long. Today, Andrea takes us on their beautiful and powerful journey of finding the queer community, embracing their queerness and non-monogamy, and then after a decade of exploring, finding themselves really embracing and enjoying monogamy. This interview is incredibly deep and vulnerable and we hope you find it as inspiring as we did. Besides hanging out on our podcast, Andrea is also an author. Rather than trying to recreate their bio, we have borrowed the following from their author page at Thornapple Press. Andrea Zanin, MA, is a white, nonbinary, middle-aged queer writer who lives in Tkaronto (Toronto, Ontario), on the traditional territory of the Mississaugas of the Credit, the Anishnabeg, the Chippewa, the Haudenosaunee and the Wendat peoples. Andrea’s writing focuses on nonmonogamy and BDSM/Leather. Andrea has written for theGlobe and Mail, The Tyee, Bitch, Ms., Xtra, IN Magazine, Outlooks Magazine and the Montreal Mirror. Their scholarly work, fiction and essays appear in a variety of collections. Andrea blogs at sexgeek.wordpress.com, where they created the 10 Rules for Happy Nonmonogamy and coined the term “polynormativity.” Their first book, Post-nonmonogamy and Beyond, is available from Thornapple Press and they co-authored the second edition of More Than Two. Check out the full show notes here. Click here to join our upcoming Bay Area Retreat - Sept. 13-15, 2024 Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

We always love when we get to bring guests back on the show for an update and today is definitely no exception! The last time we talked to these four was back in 2019 on Episode 71 and while so much has changed, the love between these four has only grown deeper. And it sure is a good thing because they all got matching tattoos pretty early on! Over the last five years they've transitioned to a long distance relationship and then back to living in the same city, they've broken up and gotten back together, they've come out to family (sometimes accidentally), and they've navigated a global pandemic. Quad dynamics are notoriously challenging and today we get an incredibly vulnerable look at how these four have made it work and how they've all grown together, and as individuals, along the way. Check out the full show notes here. Click here to join our upcoming Bay Area Retreat - Sept. 13-15, 2024 Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Meshai and Fin team up together to answer amazing listener questions every fourth Friday of each month! However... This month we have a special guest! Today's questions are all about finances and money and we have an incredible author, coach, and fellow podcaster Laura Boyle joining us! Laura just published her second book, "Monogamy? In This Economy?: Finances, Childrearing, and Other Practical Concerns of Polyamory" and she's also the creator of readyforpolyamory.com where you can find more information about all of her fantastic work! Quick note and disclaimer... Laura, Meshai, and myself (Fin) are NOT tax or finance professionals. Please talk to a financial professional, CPA, or similar about your specific financial situation. If YOU have a question, we'd love to hear it! Please, ask us anything by clicking here! We are super excited to be partnering with Meshai for the Ask Us Anything episodes! She first appeared on the podcast on Episode 233 and we're honored to have her back! Meshai is relationship coach with the team at Expansive Connection. She believes in the power of living as one’s authentic self, and the freedom that comes from changing perspectives. She loves putting the puzzle pieces of a couple's sexual energy together and aiding them in positive and explorative movement. Her coaching work implements creative synergy, openness, self-expression, and the confrontation of challenges through self-determination. She helps individuals from diverse populations move forward with their goals while being fully aware that trauma can play on the whole person. Meshai is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and is certified in both Trauma Therapy and Sex Therapy, and she is trained in Dialectical Behavior Therapy. You likely know me (Fin) from over 300 episodes of Normalizing Non-Monogamy. Just in case you don't, I cohost the podcast with my partner Emma and we have been in an open relationship together for over 15 years. I also completed a sex and relationship coaching program through the Somatica Institute in March 2024! Check out the full show notes here. Submit a question for our Ask Us Anything Episodes! Click here to join our upcoming Virtual Meet and Greets! Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Check out our weekly peer support groups! Skip the ads and sign up for the Premium Feed! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Today we get to hear an incredible New York Love Story like no other! Bear is a Black queer man of trans experience, born, raised and currently residing in Brooklyn, NY. Fifi is a first-generation queer, non-binary Puerto Rican born, raised, and also living in New York. And together they have forged a partnership that is uniquely theirs and is mutually uplifting while defying the status quo of what everyone says a relationship "should" be. They describe themselves as solo polyamorists who live together as a family and run a business together. They met over a decade ago at a party and since then have been loving and supporting one another on their individual healing journeys of coming out and embracing their authentic selves. Bear and Fifi also do incredibly powerful work in educating and supporting others in their own journeys. The following descriptions come directly from their website and capture who they are better than we could ever imagine doing ourselves. Please check out their website for more information on how to work with these two amazing humans! Before teaching adults, Bear taught poetry to youth in NYC public schools. He began his career as a coach and case manager in 2018, and has since serviced people of all abilities, backgrounds, and circumstances. During his time in a private residential treatment facility for adults with mental diagnoses and substance abuse disorders, he practiced crisis intervention, de-escalation tactics, and harm reduction protocols. He then managed cases at Callen Lorde community health clinic and trained in public health policy, gender affirming care, and safer sex. He also distributed housing and medical resources to NYC’s most vulnerable populations. Bear co-founded Bear & Fifi Coaching in November 2021 with his partner, and became an Urban Tantra certified somatic practitioner in November 2022. He authors all Bear & Fifi Coaching theory and curriculum, including the creation of accessibility conscious tools and exercises to support emotional/nervous system regulation, non-violent communication, vulnerability + connection, and erotic embodiment. Individually, Bear works with men and masc people of all experiences, members of the TGNC community and survivors of complex relational trauma and abuse. Fifi is a trained architect, social entrepreneur, and spiritual guide. Their lens is informed by their knowledge of design systems, Tantric embodiment + Kundalini yoga, 17 years of practicing and teaching meditation, and 12 years of continuous recovery from anxiety disorders. As a certified Urban Tantra practitioner, they coach people, particularly those socialized as women, seeking better relationships, deeper intimacy, and more authenticity in their lives. Whether by creating personalized rituals or guiding you through accessing your intuition, Fifi’s goal is to support you with using sensuality as a therapeutic tool and building foundations for a life beyond what you think you deserve. Fifi is also a non-profit executive serving communities in The Bronx and Harlem through social change and leadership fellowships, art enrichment programs, and historical-multicultural performance presentations. Check out the full show notes here. Click here to join our upcoming Bay Area Retreat - Sept. 13-15, 2024 Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

In her early twenties Mae repeatedly found herself in a cycle of getting into a relationship, developing feelings for someone else, fighting them off for a while and then ultimately cheating and blowing it up only to do it all over again. Then a friend invited her to a kink event which lead to her first dungeon party which changed her life forever... For about the next seven years Mae was consumed on an adventure exploring events, parties, connections, and what was possible in life, love, and pleasure. Today, Mae is exploring her own flavor of polyamory and non-monogamy. She has a primary partner along with other people that she dates plus she has some subs and perhaps even a few play partners. As Mae puts it... "If you're not having fun, you may want to question why you're doing it..." And no surprise, this interview with Mae is full of laughs and wild adventures. Mae also shares with us a bit about her powerful work and describes herself on her website better than we ever could... The Adorable Domme, Miss Mae Ling is a Los Angeles Dominatrix whose charmingly open and sweet approach to life draws out the best in others. Her motto in life is to have fun and enjoy the best of what life has to offer. She seeks to find the true person that is inside of you, cutting through all the exterior and relating with your desires and deepest emotions. The raw truth is what she is after. Check out all of her work and learn more over on her website! Check out the full show notes here. Click here to join our upcoming Bay Area Retreat - Sept. 13-15, 2024 Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Jen identifies as a queer, pansexual, non-binary, relationship anarchist and has been living with their partner for over 12 years. However, that's not how things looked 12 years ago when they got together! Jen grew up in Ireland where cultural and religious norms didn't leave much room for being different in any way. Their first exposure to something new and different came during university... However, Jen's biggest changes started when they found an amazing therapist after moving to Scotland. Therapy was a pivotal moment in Jen's life and gave them space to start deconstructing so many parts of who they are after not having a sense of self for so long. This also led to Jen questioning what they wanted relationships to look like. Jen's experience in therapy was also their inspiration for becoming a therapist themselves! Today, Jen is a person-centred experiential psychotherapist whose approach is all about offering you a radically non-judgemental relationship where you can safely get to know yourself. You can learn more about Jen's incredible work on their website! Check out the full show notes here. Click here to join our upcoming Bay Area Retreat - Sept. 13-15, 2024 Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

"It's been a beautiful journey so far... But oh so messy!" Christa Lei and their partner originally opened their relationship into a "don't ask, don't tell" dynamic, even though neither of them ever acted on it. Eventually, they gave it a little more thought and made a shift to a more integrated kitchen-table poly dynamic, which is how they've now been exploring for the last few years. Christa's not here to pretend like everything is always easy and perfect. Navigating relationships can be really hard and they've found a lot of power and support in creating a care team for themself through their polyamory community. For Christa, polyamory is just as much about building community and support systems as it is about the dating and romance. Although, there's definitely some of that as well... Did they mention it can get messy? And... awesome for us, Christa sent over their own bio and so we just had to copy and paste! Woop woop! (Thanks, Christa!) Christa Lei (they/them/theirs) grew up on Native Hawaiian land as the youngest child of Filipino immigrants. Their professional experiences revolve around healthcare: patient advocacy, casework/care facilitation, and clinical research. Their intersectional identities as fat, neurodivergent, disabled, queer, polyamorous, and third-culture person inform their personal and professional work. A multi-modal and experienced creative, Christa creates and facilitates spaces for interdisciplinary praxis via community care. Along with their lived experiences as a crip queer person, they are certified as a death doula by Going with Grace. In their spare time, they dance, sing, write, travel around the world, point out all the puppies on the street, preach the gospel of Shrek, and create shared futures with their chosen family of their loving spouse and two dogs in New York City. Connect with them via Instagram (@supchrista) or at christalei.me or their newsletter isthiswhatyouwant.org. Check out the full show notes here. Click here to join our upcoming Bay Area Retreat - Sept. 13-15, 2024 Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Meshai and Fin team up together to answer amazing listener questions every fourth Friday of each month! However... This month we have a special guest! Today's questions are all about compersion and we have one of the world's leading experts on the subject joining us! Dr. Marie Thouin is a dating and relationship coach as well as the author of the new book "What is compersion?" You can learn more about Marie and her work at www.whatiscompersion.com. You can also save 25% if you order your copy of her book using the link and code below! "What is Compersion?" (Use code RLFANDF25 to save 25%) If YOU have a question, we'd love to hear it! Please, ask us anything by clicking here! We are super excited to be partnering with Meshai for the Ask Us Anything episodes! She first appeared on the podcast on Episode 233 and we're honored to have her back! Meshai is relationship coach with the team at Expansive Connection. She believes in the power of living as one’s authentic self, and the freedom that comes from changing perspectives. She loves putting the puzzle pieces of a couple's sexual energy together and aiding them in positive and explorative movement. Her coaching work implements creative synergy, openness, self-expression, and the confrontation of challenges through self-determination. She helps individuals from diverse populations move forward with their goals while being fully aware that trauma can play on the whole person. Meshai is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and is certified in both Trauma Therapy and Sex Therapy, and she is trained in Dialectical Behavior Therapy. You likely know me (Fin) from over 300 episodes of Normalizing Non-Monogamy. Just in case you don't, I cohost the podcast with my partner Emma and we have been in an open relationship together for over 15 years. I also completed a sex and relationship coaching program through the Somatica Institute in March 2024! Check out the full show notes here. Submit a question for our Ask Us Anything Episodes! Click here to join our upcoming Virtual Meet and Greets! Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet! Check out our weekly peer support groups! Skip the ads and sign up for the Premium Feed! Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing