Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Parenting

Dr. Lisa and Reena tackle the nuances of ADHD: what to look for, when to be concerned, and the overlap between ADHD and executive functioning challenges. Dr. Lisa unpacks how, ideally, an ADHD diagnosis is made and the treatment options for kids and teenagers who receive the diagnosis. The conversation also answers some key questions about when medication should be considered, whether taking medication for ADHD increases the risks of misusing substances, and whether a medication trial can be used to confirm an ADHD diagnosis. The American Academy of Pediatrics: ADHD Follow and subscribe to our YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sports is not just about the final score. It’s an opportunity for kids to grow, to learn how to improve their skills, and to be a good teammate. But athletics today can be incredibly competitive, aggressive, and emotionally intense. Dr. Lisa offers strategies for when kids lose their cool when things don’t go their way and explains how to help kids manage their reactions when they make mistakes. Reena asks about how far you should push a kid who wants to quit a sport they’re good at and if we should encourage kids to stick with sports that don’t come naturally. Book recommendation: Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck, PhD Follow and subscribe to our new YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Parents can feel worried when their teen first starts driving or riding around in friends’ cars. What can parents do to help teens stay safe behind the wheel? What rules should be put in place and how well do those rules work? Dr. Lisa and Reena answer these questions and more while also addressing graduated drivers’ license laws and the part they play in reducing accidents among young drivers. Follow and subscribe to our new YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Special guest professor Dr. Traci Baxley joins the Ask Lisa podcast. She is the author of Social Justice Parenting: How to Raise Compassionate, Anti-racist, Justice-minded Kids in an Unjust World. Dr. Baxley talks with Dr. Lisa and Reena about why it matters to raise caring, socially conscious kids - and how to do so. This episode unpacks the difference between compassion, empathy, and kindness and tackles questions from listeners including: How do you get siblings to be compassionate with each other? And are compassionate kids really better off in today’s hyper-competitive world? Follow and subscribe to our new YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Parents can feel worried when their teen first starts driving or riding around in friends’ cars. What can parents do to help teens stay safe behind the wheel? What rules should be put in place and how well do those rules work? Dr. Lisa and Reena answer these questions and more while also addressing graduated drivers’ license laws and the part they play in reducing accidents among young drivers. Follow and subscribe to our new YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast Join us NOVEMBER 6th for our very first Ask Lisa Podcast live event - get your tickets here: stagepilot.com/asklisa And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent writes in about a middle schooler's intense emotional swings which leave the parent feeling uncertain about how to respond. Dr. Lisa and Reena dive into the psychology of these rollercoaster emotions, discuss whether this behavior is typical at this age, and address how parents can strike the delicate balance of offering support without amplifying the mood swings. Dr. Lisa also explains how parents and caregivers can know when they are looking at typical emotional growing pains and when it’s time to be concerned. Join us for our first Ask Lisa LIVE streaming event. Nov 6th, Monday, 8pm est Buy tickets at: https://stagepilot.com/asklisa Follow and subscribe to our new YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes. https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources. https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A mother writes in asking how to protect her teen from a controlling and degrading relationship. Dr. Lisa and Reena discuss the nature of unhealthy relationships and how and when adults should intervene. Reena asks how parents can recognize the early signs of a harmful connection. Lisa explains how thoughtful people can find themselves in bad relationships and why the stakes can be incredibly high for a teen's well-being. Dr. Lisa’s Resource Guide The National Domestic Hotline - 1.800.799.SAFE SMS: Text START to 88788 Www.Joinonelove.org Join us for our first Ask Lisa LIVE streaming event. Nov 6th, Monday, 8pm est Buy tickets at: https://stagepilot.com/asklisa Follow and subscribe to our new YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

So what’s really happening when kids go through puberty? Dr. Cara Natterson and Vanessa Bennett join the Ask Lisa podcast to talk about their new book This is So Awkward: Modern Puberty Explained. The conversation takes a deep dive into the research on puberty and tackles key questions: When does puberty start and end? Why do kids suddenly smell bad, and how do we help? What’s the best way to respond to teens’ surging hormones? How do we support late bloomers? And more! Lisa’s Book Recommendation: This is So Awkward By Cara Natterson, MD and Vanessa Kroll Bennett https://www.amazon.com/This-So-Awkward-Puberty-Explained/dp/0593580958 Follow and subscribe to our new YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast Join us NOVEMBER 6th for our very first Ask Lisa Podcast live event - get your tickets here: stagepilot.com/asklisa And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Parents who need to be out of town for the weekend worry their 16-year-old son will throw a party while they’re away. They want to trust him but can’t shake the feeling that something is brewing. What should parents know about leaving teens home alone? And when should they worry? Dr. Lisa explains the potential consequences of allowing teens to host parties. Reena asks if it’s safer to have teens drinking at your home when adults are present. Their conversation also considers what parents might do if they know their teen is headed to a party where drinking - with or without adult supervision - might happen. Follow and subscribe to our new YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast Join us NOVEMBER 6th for our very first Ask Lisa Podcast live event - get your tickets here: stagepilot.com/asklisa And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dr. Lisa and Reena tackle two letters about the challenges of parenting teens with chronic health conditions. The first letter centers on addressing a teen’s sense of feeling “different” and asks what parents can do to prevent social isolation. The second letter asks how parents and caregivers can stay out of a power struggle with a teen who may not be following doctor’s orders. Dr. Lisa and Reena answer both questions and, in doing so, offer guidance that will resonate with any parent sharing similar concerns. Lisa’s Book Recommendation: The Science of Making Friends by Dr. Elizabeth Laugeson Follow and subscribe to our new YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast Join us NOVEMBER 6th for our very first Ask Lisa Podcast live event - get your tickets here: stagepilot.com/asklisa And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent feels uncomfortable when her preteen daughter wears crop tops. She worries about the attention her daughter might receive, but also wonders if she's the one who's out of touch. Dr. Lisa and Reena address the complexities of setting boundaries around what kids wear and how to balance policing attire with allowing kids to express their own style. Reena asks what parents should do if they suspect that a child sneaks prohibited clothing to wear when they're out - and if clothing choices are really a big deal in the grand scheme of parenting. Follow and subscribe to our new YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast Join us NOVEMBER 6th for our very first Ask Lisa Podcast live event - get your tickets here: stagepilot.com/asklisa And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What causes kids to struggle with perfectionism? Dr. Lisa explains why young people sometimes hold themselves to unsustainable standards and how adults can help them to set realistic goals. Reena asks how parents can counter the harmful self-talk that often accompanies perfectionism and when parents should worry that perfectionism could lead to depression. In an episode packed with practical strategies and sample language, Dr. Lisa and Reena address how to help kids take a balanced approach to their work. Follow and subscribe to our new YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast Join us NOVEMBER 6th for our very first Ask Lisa Podcast live event - get your tickets here: stagepilot.com/asklisa And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A mother writes in about the fact that her teen son and his friends - who come from a mix of racial, religious, and socio-economic backgrounds - "jokingly" use slurs. Does she have the power to stop this? Dr. Lisa and Reena explore what's driving the rise in hateful language and what adults can do to address this hurtful behavior. Reena asks whether it's realistic for adults to think they can change the dynamics that unfold when teens are with their friends. Dr. Lisa offers advice on how to guide teenagers toward acting with empathy and respect. Follow and subscribe to our new YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

U.S. Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murthy visits the Ask Lisa Podcast to talk about the public health crisis you might not know about: loneliness. He joins co-hosts Dr. Lisa and Reena for a wide-ranging conversation on parenting, being a Dad, access to mental health services, the harms of social media, and what big tech companies can do to help protect our kids online. The episode ends with Dr. Murthy asking Dr. Lisa a thought-provoking question about what parents need now. Surgeon General Advisory on Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation Surgeon General Advisory on Social Media and Youth Mental Health House Calls with Dr. Vivek Murthy Podcast Follow and subscribe to our new YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Season four of the Ask Lisa podcast kicks off with a special guest, author and journalist Jennifer Breheny Wallace, who discusses her brand new book: “Never Enough: When Achievement Culture Becomes Toxic - And What We Can Do About It.” Dr. Lisa, Reena, and Jennie address how achievement pressure harms kids and what parents can do to combat grind culture. They unpack research from Harvard and the London School of Economics to answer key questions: What do the kids who are thriving in high pressure situations do differently? What can adults do to shield kids from toxic stress? How do parents put pressure on kids without even realizing it? Tune in to learn about the "puppy dog principle," why mattering is what really matters, and the one thing that parents can do that makes a difference. Follow and subscribe to our new YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes. https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast And follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources. https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Getting kids ready for the new school year can be a hard transition from summer. In this encore episode we look at helping teens manage their responsibilities during and after high school. Staying organized isn’t just about getting into college - it’s also about having the ability to operate independently. A parent writes in worried about a charming, but disorganized, son. Dr. Lisa explains what executive functioning skills are - and how to help kids build them. Dr. Lisa and Reena address what drives procrastination in kids, how adults can provide executive functioning "training wheels," and how to get kids to do things like homework without having to nag constantly. The conversation also considers when parents should offer lots of support, and when kids should be allowed to feel the consequences of being disorganized. AVAILABLE NOW: The Emotional Lives of Teenagers by Dr. Lisa Damour. Available at www.DrLisaDamour.com and everywhere books are sold. Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @LDamour, @ReenaNinan Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: Www.GoodTroubleProductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

When should parents limit - or even forbid - the use of TikTok? Dr. Lisa and Reena take a deep dive into the upsides and downsides of social media and how the norms kids encounter in online environments can influence real-world behavior. The conversation sheds light on the algorithms that drive social media, what parents need to be on the lookout for, when it's time to worry, and what parents should do. AVAILABLE NOW: The Emotional Lives of Teenagers by Dr. Lisa Damour. Available at www.DrLisaDamour.com and everywhere books are sold. Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @LDamour, @ReenaNinan Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: Www.GoodTroubleProductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why do kids suddenly turn on friends and ice them out of a group? It’s something Dr. Lisa says she's been hearing about more often in recent months as kids need shared interests to hold their groups together, and that "social glue" was depleted by the pandemic. We take a look at how this negative behavior can emerge in friend groups and quickly become destructive. Reena asks if adults should call out mean behavior or reach out to other parents when social groups turn sour. Dr. Lisa covers what kids should do when classmates are nice to them one-on-one but won't include them in groups at school. AVAILABLE NOW: The Emotional Lives of Teenagers by Dr. Lisa Damour. Available at www.DrLisaDamour.com and everywhere books are sold. Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @LDamour, @ReenaNinan Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: Www.GoodTroubleProductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It’s easy to track kids using cell phone technology. But is it a good idea to do so? Today's technology allows us to know a lot more about our kids than our parents ever knew about us. While parents might track their teens for supervision and safety reasons, teens often long for more independence and privacy than tracking allows. Dr. Lisa explains why this tension is an expectable, healthy part of adolescent development and unpacks two key questions: What, exactly, does tracking accomplish? And does it really help to keep teens safe? Reena asks about the downsides of tracking a teen’s location and Dr. Lisa lays out the tricky scenarios she's encountered in her practice. AVAILABLE NOW: The Emotional Lives of Teenagers by Dr. Lisa Damour. Available at www.DrLisaDamour.com and everywhere books are sold. Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @LDamour, @ReenaNinan Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: Www.GoodTroubleProductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What are the signs of a gaming addiction? It’s easy in the summer to have lax rules and allow more gaming and screen time. But when does gaming cross the line into being too much? A mom writes in worried about her son who used gaming to connect with friends during the pandemic but now games alone while his friends spend time together in person. Dr. Lisa unpacks the research on gaming hazards and addiction, as well as some unexpected benefits of gaming. Reena gets answers to key questions: When is it time to worry that a kid is spending too much time gaming? And what should parents do? AVAILABLE NOW: The Emotional Lives of Teenagers by Dr. Lisa Damour. Available at www.DrLisaDamour.com and everywhere books are sold. Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @LDamour, @ReenaNinan Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: Www.GoodTroubleProductions.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices